GF Journey – Recipe Fail

Hey all,

So I have to share that since I have been doing GF at times my husband has teased me about GF standing for “Good Free”…as in anything Gluten Free is also free of good taste.

Now, I know that is not true. But he thinks he’s cute and funny…probably because I laugh at him and…well he is cute.

BUT this blog today is about a Gluten FAIL, not about my awesome  cute hubby.

I tried making Coleslaw the other day, had the cabbage, the carrots, the onion, everything. and so I thought I would try making the sauce from scratch. That included making the mayo by scratch.

Lets just say I tweaked the recipe a bit…substituted coconut milk for rice milk, usually no problem. Used the oils that they called for, everything else. This recipe mind you WAS a vegan recipe, so maybe that accounted for the difference in taste but…I can not tell you how difficult it was to throw out a whole bowl full of yummy cabbage, carrots, onion, garlic and such, JUST because the sauce was bad. the sauce tasted alright by itself, when I put it all together it was HORRIBLE.

Talk about a Gluten Fail.  I even tried letting it sit so the flavors would meld together just like regular ‘slaw. No go…

So not all recipes are exactly transferable to a  GF lifestyle. If I have to go through my life not eating coleslaw, I think I can handle that.

That is not to say that I am giving up, but since there are some mayo’s out there that are naturally GF, I think I will just go from there.

On another note… I had a, for lack of better words, relapse the other day.

My old familiar friend, pain, excruciating pain, came back, quite uninvited. Very rude, but there it was.

It felt like the symptoms I have been free of from almost over 2 months now…it brought tears to my eyes because I was soooooo sure I was never going to deal with this again! Instead, it found me with 2 days of intense abdominal pain, followed by several hours stuck in the bathroom while my husband asked me if I was o.k. Seriously, the embarrassment, was almost enough by itself to do me in. Now we have been married for almost 10 years, I have had 2 children with my husband present, and yet having my husband know that I am having tummy troubles, i.e. diarhea, STILL brings embarrassment to me. Which is why I use words like “my stomach is upset” or “tummy troubles”; I can NOT bring myself to SAY it to him. Thankfully, because we have been married almost 10 years, and he has dragged the word out of me, usually in front of doctors, he knows what I mean. This time was probably made worse due to the fact that I was walking home from my niece’s swim lesson and had to call to have my husband walk the rest of the way home with the girls while I zoomed back home in the car.

For the rest of the day and on into the next, I was wracking my brain trying to figure out “where did I slip up?” “Did I eat something the girls left on their plate, just on auto pilot?” “Was it the shake that I thought was safe from the local coffee shop?” “Was it the bento bowl I had with GF sauce and GF cookies on the side?” “WHERE DID I GO WRONG?!”

After reading in some books and other blogs, I came to realize that I might never know, I can just be more vigilant here on out. And thankfully, there are many options out there now for those of us who are going GF. Even for those who want coleslaw. 

For those who have Celiac’s disease or Gluten Intolerance (which, after further speaking with my Dr, is what I actually have), or other such diseases or issues where you have to be frank about what is going on… I have to applaud you. It is tough to be frank with people when they ask you whats going on. Or you have to ask people to make concessions for you because you can’t control your bowels or bladder. UGH. not fun. But, necessary. And bravery is doing what is necessary even when it embarrasses you to death. At least in my opinion. I am still working on being brave and still working on my GF journey. I would say one instance in the past 2 months is pretty good numbers.

Hope your journey is finding you episode free and full of recipes that are Gluten Free and Flavor Full!

GF Journey – Sundays and more

Hey all (there are still 3 of you reading my blog right?! lol) I am back with more musings for you to read and devour.

So I recently started on my Gluten Free journey and so far in the past two weeks I have felt GREAT!

The weight has started dropping off, which I am sure has been aided by the rowing that I am doing 3 times a week. I have lost around 4 lbs just in the last week alone.

While I was at church on sunday getting ready to partake in the communion, also called Lords Supper, it hit me that “communion bread” is made with, get ready for it….flour. Which has…Gluten.

So why is this a big deal you say? I am a christian, and as such, I partake of the Lords supper every Sunday. Why not just skip it? The Lords supper is a memorial in which those who have been baptized for the remission of their sins, remember Jesus’s sacrifice for our sins. We remember his death, his burial and resurrection…each. and every. Sunday.

As a christian, this is not something that I am willing, or going to, skip. So what is a Gluten Free, Lords Supper Partaking person supposed to do? Each month I have a set cooking/baking goal.  My Goal for this month is to make a GF great tasting cake for my daughters 1 year birthday party. Next months goal (since its a week until the end of the month) is to make a GF communion bread for us to use at church. When I come up with a good recipe, that is GF, I  will share it on here.

Typically for Lords supper bread, I just recommissioned a pie crust recipe, which I just within the past few months have mastered, so I am hoping to use that as a launching pad and go from there.

I have typically when craving a sandwich, just reached for the corn tortillas that I get from our local WIC (women, Infants and Children) program and do GF meat, or usually meatless and load up on veggies and cheese. There have been however a few times I have been desiring a bread like substance to eat my sandwiches on, or I have desired to have biscuits, or some other bread -like thing. The recipes I have found that have been the best so far was from a website called “Elana’s Pantry“…awesome website, awesome recipes, and SUPER delicious bread. I did not have “agave nectar” or “arrowroot powder” so in their places I used honey and cornstarch…respectively. The one thing that I would say that this bread could use would be to mash up a banana and sprinkle a few chocolate chips in, and voila, GF chocolate chip banana bread! YUM!

The other recipes that I have found have been from the “Wheat belly” Cookbook and I am pretty sure that it is Copyrighted so I cant post that on here. But what I WILL say is to check out the book from the library, borrow it from a friend, or do as I am going to do, and buy it off of amazon because the recipes have been great! I was able to eat biscuits and honey tonight as a snack. YUM.

The one other thing I want to share with you is that up till now (or should I say, two weeks ago) I had distinct hunger pains…almost all the time. I would wake up, hungry. Go to bed, hungry (but know I should quit eating at a certain time). I would go to a friends house, hungry. I would go out to meet the girls after dinner at our local pizza shop (for salad usually but we always ended up eating breadsticks)…hungry. When it came to baked goods, I would usually try to limit myself but I always…always…wanted more. This all after I came along way from when I was a 15 year old and could hold my own right next to my 3 growing brothers who were quite a bit more active than I was. Now, don’t get me wrong, my plate was not always piled high with food and I had a good control on my serving size and how many returns I would make. But bring out the cake, the hoho’s the coffee cake, the cookies…thats where my weakness was. Oreo double stuffed cookies…oh wow could those bring a sense of just YUM-ness to my mind. I have friends who would laugh at me because I would always say “I love food”…some of them however could not understand why I loved food. They loved clothes, or shopping, or going on twirly rides that make me want to pass out just thinking of them, but for me it was the yummy food.

Since I have gone Gluten Free…I still eat, but I don’t “love” food anymore. I still enjoy a good cookie, or a good biscuit (GF of course)…but I don’t have that hunger for it either!!!!!!! This might seem silly but it feels as if I have been addicted to a drug for a long time and I finally kicked the habit! “My name is Becky and I am a gluten-a-holic”.

I am not saying this to make anyone think that once you go on GF diet that all things will magically get better, or that GF food tastes bad…that is not the truth. What I am saying is this. I feel full. I don’t feel stuffed, I don’t still feel hungry after eating and I rarely go back for seconds because I know what I eat is enough. I am sure there are still areas that I could get better in, but for now, this is a great start.

Good bye Gluten..you and your friend Hunger can go sit on the curb cuz this ride is out of here.

~Becky

My Gluten Free Journey

Alright, so a fb friend asked me to keep track of my “GF” journey and I thought, why not? I already have a blog, might as well blog about something so near (and not quite dear yet) to my heart.

Here is the back story of why I am going gluten free.

Since I was 15 I have had “stomach issues”. This would involve every time I ate dairy, whether it was milk, ice cream, cheese, cheesecake, sour cream…whatever, any time I would eat it, severe cramping of my abdomen. Enough that I felt like the clip they show of the movie “Alien” where a creature slices through some ladies stomach and pops out…yeah. I felt that I had someone slicing me open from the inside out…combine that with hours of not being able to leave the vicinity of the nearest bathroom and vomiting and you pretty much get a picture of what I was going through. Come to think of it, a friend of mine who has endometriosis seems to describe the same type of pain at times. (I was scared I had THAT too). Now stay with me, why dairy when I am talking about gluten? I’ll get there. Its all back story. Sorry…no pun intended.

Anyway, since that time I tried cutting out all dairy products. That worked for awhile, but I would STILL have symptoms described above and I never understood it.

Fast forward about 9 years to when I had been married for a few years and was on my husbands insurance. After quite a few episodes of this happening he suggested I go in for some testing to rule out different possibilities since a few people we knew had crohns disease and such. Did said tests, got results back, biopsy’s and everything..what I was TOLD at the time was that I have IBS, or Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Was told to “lay off the coffee, caffeine, nicotene, and continue on the no dairy diet”. Since I don’t drink, don’t smoke, don’t chew and only drank pop occasionally, and had been doing dairy free for years…I thought that IBS was just doctor code for “We don’t know what you have so this is an answer we are giving you to make you happy”. I was not happy but did not think there was anything I could do.

Fast Forward about 6 years to present time (Marty and his Delorian have NOTHING on this time travel) and I am fed up.

I have been married 10 years dealing with this, that is tough of me when I get a flare up, tough on friends, tough on my husband who can’t do anything for me at the time except keep the kids away from my while I have my tummy “Issues”. Which is code for diarrhea. Yes, I said it. I HATE discussing this stuff in front of people but thankfully you can’t see my face turning red as I type, but I am hoping that this will help someone else figure out what is going on with them…so please excuse my embarrassment. Honestly I have gotten so tired of having to tell people answers for what is going on when the answers I have for them don’t seem like any sort of answers to ME, how can they seem like answers to other people.

I started seeing a new doctor and had the brilliant idea, Thank you Lord!, of having my old medical records sent from the doctors up in Seattle to my doctor down here. I have only seen this dr 3 times but I like her already. I told her about the past, yadda yadda, tests, IBS, Yadda yadda…while we are looking at the test results she says “Oh…well the results were pretty conclusive that they thought you had it, it just wasn’t 100% conclusive that you did, so that mixed with the results you are already getting from going gluten free is enough to diagnose you with it”…HALLELUJAH! I have answers! I KNEW I wasn’t crazy and that there was a reason I still felt like garbage after getting rid of dairy. Now mind you, our diet has not been the most unhealthiest of diets. We ate only wheat bread (12-15 grain if we had it), drank coconut milk, or almond milk, I make a TON of meals from scratch, LOADS of fruits and veggies, running, rowing, walking, tons of Water (which is what we drink mainly with occasional bits of juice thrown in) and I STILL had flare ups. After doing EVERYTHING the doctors had told me to.

This marks a week that I have been all Gluten Free and the difference is amazing.

I had had friends years ago tell me about going Gluten Free but their symptoms did not line up EXACTLY with mine…so I dabbled in it, but never realized before what all has gluten in it. There is a LONG list of stuff that has gluten in it, from toothpaste to chili to cream of mushroom soup! Seriously, why is there WHEAT in my CHILI or in my Pork and Beans? Toothpaste?! Craziness.

What I did not realize at the time of talking with my friends is that the symptoms do not ALL Have to line up EXACTLY. Apparently IBS is a good indicator of Celiacs disease. So is Ezcema, severe abdominal cramping, depression and easily angered. Now wait a sec? Moods affected by what you eat you  might ask? Yes. I know for some of you this might be old hat but to me alot of this is brand new. I KNEW I felt worse when I did not eat protein for breakfast, so I quit eating cereal and milk for breakfast and instead turned to oatmeal quite awhile ago or a smoothie or a handful of almonds…little did I know I was still sabotaging my body and my mood because the stuff I was going for STILL had gluten in it.

A few books that have helped me to kind of ease into this was Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease by Caldwell Esselstyn Jr., M.D., that Terri Forward told me about at a ladies tea up in Longview, Wa. This book while not dealing with celiac’s disease kind of helped ease me into a different way of thinking about food.

For any of you that know me personally know that this is a HUGE deal to me. I LOVE food. I enjoy going out to eat (even a salad!) with friends, or pastries (which were occasional treats), or just…food. I did not follow this diet to a “T” but it did help institute some different changes and gave me ideas for vegan  recipes for foods that I already loved and couldn’t have due to IBS or my milk intolerance/allergy thingy I had.

The other two books that I have been reading and really seem to help is “Lose the Wheat, Lose the Weight” by William Davis, MD The other books is “Wheat Belly Cookbook” by William Davis, MD.

I won’t re-write the books for you, but I finally feel like I have somewhere to go to for answers healthwise as far as celiac’s disease is concerned.

I will try to post in here often about recipes I have tried and loved and let you know how my journey is going.

I will say this for the first part of the week I was tired, (anyone know any mother that ISN’T tired??), more so than usual and have broken out in pimples on my forehead in what reminds me of my pre-teen years, after reading a bit, found out that is completely normal and is whats known as “wheat withdrawal” symptoms. Yes, you can laugh. My Name is Becky Jesse and I have been addicted to wheat…my whole life. No more though. I am breaking the cycle of wheat dependency and opening up a whole new world of interesting yummy food out that there is NOT going to mess with my intestines and NOT make prone to anger and NOT make me embarrassed to be somewhere and have to find out where EVERY SINGLE BATHROOM is because even though you make sure you didn’t eat any dairy, you still ate the bread and out of nowhere it hits…no more thank you very much! Gluten, you and I are through.

Thanks for reading, stay tuned for more “Adventures in GF Land with your host, Becky Jesse”….or you can make up another cool title. ~Becky

*disclaimer: I am in no way stating that endometriosis and Celiac’s is the same, just that the pain seemed similar. Also, I am not a doctor, please seek medical advice before following any diet advice. Also, I am not stating that I have no say in my actions and blaming gluten, just simply stating without gluten in my system for the past week, I have been a LOT calmer and find myself not in a fog near as much. Think that covers it. Yep. *

 

CSFF Blog Tour – day 2

As stated in my earlier post, this was a great book, actually two books, to start the blog tour back up with.

In the first book we are introduced to the main character, Thomas.

Thomas has alot of things happen in his life that serve to mold and shape him into what turns into a brave young man.

In the book though, my only beef with it is that for as young as the character is, he seems to have aLOT of wisdom that usually only comes with experience. Now mind you, it seems that he was trained at least in some way by his nurse, Sarah, so he might have some wisdom from that, but it just seems alittle too good to be true…or in this instance, a little too smart to be true.

I get that when you are a writer you get to decide what your character experiences and what they don’t, but while in writing I think that you have to keep the character in keeping with well….their character. What they learn in their life, they should show in their life…not some extraneous information that the author has. Now, because of the quality of the books, I am willing to guess that somehow this might be explained in further books. In fact, I am looking forward to checking out the 3rd book to see if I am right or not.

You will have to look into these books, The Orphan King and Fortress of Mist by Sigmund Brouwer for yourself.

Also, make sure to check out these other blogs to see what everyone else is saying about them.

Also, In conjunction with the CSFF Blog Tour, I received a free copy of this book from the publisher.

*Participants’ links
Gillian Adams
Julie Bihn
Thomas Fletcher Booher
Beckie Burnham
Janey DeMeo
Theresa Dunlap
Victor Gentile
Nikole Hahn
Jeremy Harder
Ryan Heart
Janeen Ippolito
Becky Jesse
Jason Joyner
Carol Keen
Emileigh Latham
Rebekah Loper
Shannon McDermott
Meagan @ Blooming with Books
Megan @ Hardcover Feedback
Rebecca LuElla Miller
Anna Mittower
Eve Nielsen
Nathan Reimer
James Somers
Steve Trower
Phyllis Wheeler

Csff blog tour – orphan king

Wow. I finally started back up in the blog tour and I dont think I could have chosen a better book to start up with.  We are reviewing “Orphan King” and “Fortress of Mist”, two books in Immortals series by Sigmund Brouwer. I just finished the second book and I am going online asap to see if I can buy the third book because I have to know what happens next. This book series is set back in the day…as in ancient sword fighting and knights days. I love this type of story…but this one is filled with all sort of plot twists and lots of scientific-Y type of stuff. I kind of want to go and start playing with chemistry sets now because of this book. This book keeps me rooting for the good guys, but at times I am not sure who besides the main character is good. I THINK I know, but at the same time I thought I knew the plot twists too and those hit me out of left field. After reading so many books you find yourself talking to the characters, but I have learned to do it silently so people don’t think I am crazy…this is one of them.

Who exactly ARE the immortals? If you find yourself asking this question, you are in good company. The book hints at it, and is at times leading you on like you feel like you know…but I am not sure that is the case. I will have to read the rest of the series to see if I am on track with where I think the author is going. I hope you get a chance to read this series. I am on my way to get the next book and any others by Brouwer. Read it. Thats it. Check out these links for Brouwer’s website, and this site for book #1, and This site for book #2. GET THEM.

Check out these links to see what other people have to say about the books

*Participants’ links
Gillian Adams
Julie Bihn
Thomas Fletcher Booher
Beckie Burnham
Janey DeMeo
Theresa Dunlap
Victor Gentile
Nikole Hahn
Jeremy Harder
Ryan Heart
Janeen Ippolito
Becky Jesse
Jason Joyner
Carol Keen
Emileigh Latham
Rebekah Loper
Shannon McDermott
Meagan @ Blooming with Books
Megan @ Hardcover Feedback
Rebecca LuElla Miller
Anna Mittower
Eve Nielsen
Nathan Reimer
James Somers
Steve Trower
Phyllis Wheeler

as always In conjunction with the CSFF Blog Tour, I received a free copy of this book from the publisher. 

Day 20.

Hey folks,

Today is day 20 on my fit challenge that I started with an online studio called Fit2B…I only have 70 more to go! Here is my overall opinion of myself on this challenge….yayyyyughtiredsorehappyenergylackofenergyhappyhealthytirednotsohealthy.

Did you get that? That is just a short compilation of how I have felt…sometimes all in the same day. Overall I have worked out more days than not. I have lost a few inches…my waist is now at 41 inches instead of at almost 50…That is so hard to type but at the same time so freeing! I think of all the times as a kid I felt overweight, or was not overweight but still was teased about it ore made to feel ugly…usually it was by ugly people themselves. Not on the outside, but their hearts were ugly. I was always told I was beautiful by my parents. My parents have never, in all the many memories I have of them, ever lied to me. I was told I was beautiful inside and out and somewhere along the way I bought into the lie that because I did not look a certain way, dress a certain way, have my hair cut and colored a certain way, that I was ugly.

Where did this lie first come from? Was it in my adolescence, during my pre-teen years when I would see the magazines at the store that said you had to be in a size 4 jeans to be beautiful? Was it at camps when a few older girls laughed at me because I didn’t know how to curl my hair? I can not remember when I first bought into this lie but it has been presented to me throughout my whole life. During the times when I have been tired or discouraged already, this tiny vicious bald faced lie comes in to remind me that I am not conforming to the worlds standards of beauty and that instead of standing up for the Truth, that I was created in the image of a wonderful and beautiful creator, that I should give in and just accept the lie as truth. This lie affects everything and every part of my life. It says “you are ugly.” “You are not a good example of motherhood because you are not put together.” “You are not a good friend because you do not know how to present yourself like others do”, or “you are not a good wife because you did not do your hair today”….worst one of all is the lie that “You are not loved or lovable”.

This is what is at the heart of the lie. Because I don’t feel beautiful I don’t feel loved. Because I don’t feel loved I don’t feel beautiful.  Now don’t get me wrong, my husband has been great at telling me that I am beautiful…and my husband does not lie either! It is not other people that is making me feel unloved, un beautiful, un happy…it is me buying into the lie that satan has presented to me. Instead of working to believe the truth about me, it is easier to give in and let the lie consume me. Let it get me down. Let it make me feel horrible, let it make me think that people are just being kind…(i.e. lying to me)… I have had enough!

During this fit challenge I have been blessed to be able to participate in and try to do something that is moving my body every single day. Some days I have moved by taking groceries inside the house and using the bags as weights…I have used playing with sarah as my exercise….I have used workout videos, I have ran and…I have learned something.

I. am. beautiful. I. am. loved. I. am. wonderfully. beautifully. awesomely. made.

Don’t get me wrong. This is not a post to boost my self esteem or to brag about how awesomely cool I am (those of you who know me personally already know this about me…don’t forget how humble I am too!!! ), this is a post to remind YOU of how beautiful YOU are too. and to remind you that God doesn’t make junk! If I am expecting my daughter to believe this, I have to show her I believe it too!

I have learned that I am beautifully and wonderfully made. God made all the muscles in my body to work just so…the hip bones connected to the…something bone…which is connected to the…shoulder bone….connected to the…something else bone… alright forget the song. God has blessed me with a beautiful system of how things work…I workout, I feel better. I work out, I am more able to take care of my family. I work out, I am able to have strength for my friends to lean on. I work out and I am able to share with someone who needs a kindly word to not give up. I work out and I am able to look at myself through the eyes of my daughter who thinks I am beautiful. Not because I look like a model, but because I can laugh and giggle and smile and play with her. She had told me often “Mommy, I want to grow up to be just like you…a mommy AND a doctor…that helps big kids”.  I am not a doctor. But the fact that my daughter wants to be just like me…wow.

Suffice it to say that I am happy I started this fit challenge. It has helped me in more ways than just physically, it has helped me  mentally too. Christ is working on me spiritually, but  even that has been helped.

Thats all for now.

F2B90 day 5!

Back again. *sigh* (contented one this time). Alright, I can NOT express enough through little tiny characters on a blank page without hand motions and the excited squeals that go along with that how excited I am!!!

This is day 5 of my Fit 2 b 90 day challenge and I. have. stuck. with. it!!! O.k, some of you might be saying, “Uhm Becky, this is ONLY day 5″, my rebuttal to you would be, “Hey, This is day 5! I have done some form of exercise EVERY single one of those days! And weighed myself AND made more of an effort to drink a full 8 glasses of water. On the water front, I have not done so well, the closest I have gotten was 6 glasses in one day, but the thing is I have stayed with it. 

Tonight I did a workout that is a variation of an exercise I have done before but never really “gotten” it before. The thing I love about these videos is that even in my busy days, vacuuming, washing dishes, laundry, watching my niece and nephew along with my two little loveys, (they are great and LOVE netflix though so its easy! lol), taking care of my upset-tummy-crying machine masquerading as a cute little 6 month old, making breakfast, lunch, and dinner AND clipping coupons, even in the midst of all that, I can fit a video in and feel so much better about myself!

I love the fact that on the days I want/need to go for a run, my wonderful hubby will watch both the girls when he is able, Sunday afternoon however was not a day he was able. He was doing his workout, chopping wood (actually, I was informed that it was called “splitting” wood, not cutting because cutting goes across the grain and SPLITTING, well, it SPLITS the grains- thank you husband). So, handy person that I am, I got out the coolest thing I have in my garage (a double seater JOGGING stroller!!!), pumped up the tires, after I figured out how to take them off, put them back on full of air, put the big girl down for a nap,  (hubby was RIGHT outside the door…she was safe) and wrapped up little girl and set out to do my Couch to 5K run with my sister in law.

Whooooooooeeee!

That run is kicking my hindquarters but…you guessed it. I DID IT! This was week 6, actually TECHNICALLY I think it is about 12 weeks that we have done this, but between family vacations, pneumonia  bum legs, bad colds, bronchitis, and toes or feet that were hurt somehow (that was both of us!), we are just getting to week 6 together. 

This was a warm up, a 10 minute run, a 3 minute walk and another 10 minute run and then a cool down. I thought, Sooooooo easy, I’ve already done a 20 minute straight run, two 10 minute runs is nothing.

I ate my words. It is something. Especially when pushing a 15lber in a stroller. I felt such a sense of accomplishment though when last night before I went to bed, I flexed and happened to see definition in my leg muscle!!!  I have muscles in my legs!!! I  have always had a stronger lower body than an upper body but I have never really seen evidence of it before last night. 

That euphoric feeling is the same one I had tonight after I finished my workout. They are two totally separate workouts, but I think the reason I had the feeling both times is because, as stated before, I “stuck” with it, and I feel great!  

Lord willing, I am going to finish this challenge having done some form of exercise every single day.

Lord willing, I am going to RUN a 5k.

Lord Willing, I am going to drink a full 8 glasses of water every day.

Lord willing, I am going to be….fit. 

 

Weigh in: 193.2lbs

Stats: Belly – 46 1/4